What do you tell your kids about where they came from?
#1
Hello all,

I am not a father yet, but I would like to know from experienced/inexperienced atheists how would they tell their kids about where they came from?

This isn't about the "Birds and the bees" which we normally discuss when kids are discovering their sexuality.

In this thread, I am concerned with little kids asking simple question "Daddy, where did I came from?".

I feel that atleast for some point of time we have to tell them lies. How do we know when is the right time?

All ideas are welcome.
Reply
#2
(30-Apr-2010, 06:38 PM)shobhitg Wrote: Hello all,

I am not a father yet, but I would like to know from experienced/inexperienced atheists how would they tell their kids about where they came from?

This isn't about the "Birds and the bees" which we normally discuss when kids are discovering their sexuality.

In this thread, I am concerned with little kids asking simple question "Daddy, where did I came from?".

I feel that atleast for some point of time we have to tell them lies. How do we know when is the right time?

All ideas are welcome.

Not sure how many kids ask that question. I have two boys now aged 15 and 19 and they never asked me where they came from or where they are going smile Even so, the stork theory and other BS to be avoided. Fortunately I got them started with reading Skeptic Magazine a long time ago. They have a nice section for kids. Then it was evolution by Dawkins and David Attenborough. Humor and debunking through Penn and Teller, George Carlin and other good thinkers and of course Nirmukta. And they are on their way..not too difficult with so many great resources these days and if you are in North America its easier for yousmile
Reply
#3
Sex education has actually been banned in Gujarat, Maharashtra, Madhya Pradesh, Karnataka and Kerala!
Reply
#4
(05-May-2010, 11:21 AM)siddharth Wrote: Sex education has actually been banned in Gujarat, Maharashtra, Madhya Pradesh, Karnataka and Kerala!

Is this going to control the population growth?
Reply
#5
LOL, I wouldn't worry about it, If my son or daughter is asking that question, that mean they are old enough to question their origin, or at least they are thinking something about it, so i would tell them everything..

-
kapil
Reply
#6
(17-Aug-2010, 02:28 AM)ayyawar Wrote: LOL, I wouldn't worry about it, If my son or daughter is asking that question, that mean they are old enough to question their origin, or at least they are thinking something about it, so i would tell them everything..

I feel that kids below 10 years could still ask this question, and answering them should be carefully handled. If you tell them the truth, at their imaginative age they could be tempted to experiment - though they are prepubescent this sort of thing is too weird if not unhealthy. I think at this age, it is best to avoid the question.

If you tell 12 year olds exactly where they came from, I suspect they would suffer some minor shock unless they already have a vague idea. Lol Either they would be utterly surprised or utterly disgusted Cursing ! Since our society is currently miserably failing at imparting sex education in schools, it pretty much falls to parents to do it. They need to teach their adolescent kids that sex could be dangerous, raising a kid is no easy task, etc. I'm pretty sure advice is available in large amounts online or in books.
Aditya Manthramurthy
Web Administrator & Associate Editor
Nirmukta.com
[+] 1 user Likes donatello's post
Reply
#7
Actually the question should be "Where did we all come from?", then you briefly start with big bang, abiogenesis, evolution and finally end up with Homo sapiens. Tell her how we species on earth are surviving by reproducing ourselves.
[+] 1 user Likes shrihara's post
Reply
#8
I am reminded of this.




Reply
#9
(30-Apr-2010, 06:38 PM)shobhitg Wrote: Hello all,

I am not a father yet, but I would like to know from experienced/inexperienced atheists how would they tell their kids about where they came from?

This isn't about the "Birds and the bees" which we normally discuss when kids are discovering their sexuality.

In this thread, I am concerned with little kids asking simple question "Daddy, where did I came from?".

I feel that atleast for some point of time we have to tell them lies. How do we know when is the right time?

All ideas are welcome.

Hello
This is my first post here, and this seems to be an old one at that, but this is something I have been seriously thinking about, since I have a 6 year old boy of my own, who is interested in all kinds of questions and this being one.

For my kid I pointed to him how all creatures are born...ie from an egg, and how in some creatures the egg comes out and hatches and in some how the remains inside and turns into the baby and comes out. This was enough to satisfy him. He understood because he has seen pregnant mothers. As for how the baby comes out, I showed him some clips of birth on the animal planet, and he seemed satisfied. He was not shocked, a little disgusted may be.

Things will get complicated when he becomes more curious about his body, but I dont subscribe to the idea of being prudent, or even fearing psychological scars. Sex is a fact of life and as a parent I feel it is better to not create a barrier with a child because of my own prejudice about it. What I want my kid to know are the dangers of diseases and how 'sex' can change the perception of the world ..of how he views other people be it men or women. How his hormones will control his mind and body, what to be ashamed of and what not to be ashamed of. Society will instill some notions into him too, but I would not want him to be ashamed of any aspect of himself. I think Sex education should be something a parent takes upon himself or herself to teach their children, and that too through out a child's life. It is better for an emotionally well adjusted adult.

[+] 2 users Like Girl's post
Reply
#10
Here is an excellent article why parent/elder lies to kids... http://www.paulgraham.com/lies.html
Indians today are governed by two different ideologies. Their political ideal set in the preamble of the Constitution affirms a life of liberty, equality and fraternity. Their social ideal embodied in their religion denies them. - Ambedkar
Reply
#11
The essay feels like an average American family of the 80ies. Today with technology shrinking the world is it still possible for parents to take the "ostrich head in the sand" approach when talking to the kids about life's tough questions? As a parent I am amazed at the flexibility of my kid's growing mind, and how my prejudice and opinions will affect and influence my kids. Being a parent gives me twice the experience at life, one my own and one through the child. With that said, it just feels like excuse to put old wine in new bottle.

(28-Dec-2011, 12:37 PM)nispat Wrote: Here is an excellent article why parent/elder lies to kids... http://www.paulgraham.com/lies.html

Reply


Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Naming the kids. United_Floyd 7 5,421 30-Aug-2016, 02:40 PM
Last Post: Janani Iyer
  How to screw up your kids. palaeo 10 6,079 10-Aug-2011, 04:27 AM
Last Post: nick87



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)